Saturday, July 29, 2006

Quartus Dies (aka The Fourth Day. It's Latin)

Mark, our junior marketing analyst, had a wild night.
He slept on his couch at the office.

This morning he showed us the following MS Paint graph, explaining that it is a theory he had written when he was eight.
Mark was a baby genius, he learned how to play the tambourine and Pictionary at four.
No wonder he’s so smart.

Marketing’s not easy.
Mark makes it so tasty though.
We think he's trying to say that we have to conquer the Purple Dot.
We're not sure. We're gonna ask him tomorrow.
He went to the pool now.

Friday, July 28, 2006

THE day 3

This morning, Rufus, our junior production manager, wanted to share something with the team.
Rufus has Guacamole for breakfast.
He says it’s a tradition in his country.
He comes from Turkmenistan though. His real name is Saparmurat.
Here is the transcript of this morning’s brainstorming session that Jody, our senior vice-transcriber, worked on.
Rufus: ”We have to change our strategy. We need more videos.”
Us: “You’re the production manager, you should take care of that”.
Rufus: “I’m a refugee from Turkmenistan, not God”.
Rufus is a joker.
Rufus: “I’ve been reading the website lately. I think we need a new name for Day 3”.
Us: “Any suggestions?”
Rufus: “Yes. THE day 3”
He told us he has a degree in English literature.
Maybe he's just tired.
Us: “Rufus, that’s not correct in English. You cannot say THE day 3”
Rufus: “Correct, shmorrect. We’re trying to make a revolution.”
We think he has a point.
Thanks Rufus.

The Bitter and the Sweet: Big Time Frustrations

Mark, our junior marketing analyst, finally got out of the bathroom after two hours. We tried to talk to him to check if he was ok, but he kept on walking to his office and locked himself in.
We’re very worried about him.
After half an hour, he slipped the following memo under his door, kindly asking us to publish it on the website as it came from his hands.
Janine, our junior head secretary, did a scan for us.
We don’t understand why he used MS Paint for this one too.



We were surprised to understand that Mark is also a poet.
He didn’t put it in his resumé.
It was probably really hard for him to dig in his feelings this much and make it public.
We really appreciated how he put himself in the kid’s clothes with the word “soaked”.
If only there were more Marks.
We think we’re going to fire Janine.
This scan sucks.

Thursday, July 27, 2006

Harming the Brother While Harming the Mint: Mentos and Coke Weapons

OK, that’s it. This is the limit. Not only you want to harm poor minty Mentos, but you want to create a weapon to harm someone else while you’re harming sweety minty freshy Mentos? Doesn’t this harming thing get a little too much for you? And using kids to do it? And did you even pay them? And how? Did you give them candies? MENTOS maybe?



Mark, our junior marketing analyst, is outraged. He was speechless when he saw this. He said he doesn’t know if he will be able to draw again.
We did find the following drawing in computer’s Trash bin after he locked himself up in the bathroom. We believe he used MS Paint for this.



Stacy, our senior human resources manager, suggested that it might represent a hint of a split personality.
Stacy sometimes is just too much.
We think he just wants to feel precious.
This drawing is kinda heavy though.

Another Thank You: Thank You

Prolific blogger Nalts of Will Video for Food showed some love today. He showed Mentos love. The love that he has probably received from Mentos during the years.
He also produced the following PSA, supporting our campaign.



We think he's a cool guy.
Mark, our Junior Marketing Analyst, would like to draw a big red heart for him but he finished the red pencil.
We're gonna get him one tomorrow and see if he still wants to.
He's kinda moody.

A New Day: Day 2

Day 1 was mildly successful, still better than nothing.
This morning our team woke up hungover from champagne, everybody wanted to celebrate the beginning of our campaign.
Although not in the best shape, we're quite satisfied by this morning's brainstorming session.
Mark, our Junior Marketing Analyst, drew the following graph in MS Paint to shape our goals for the coming weeks.



It is important for our campaign to conquer the biggest share of the internet video market.
We're very proud of having Mark in our group.
He's one of the brightest minds we've ever met.
His dream is making a living out of drawing though.
We think he has a gift.

A Thank You: Thanks

We kindly thank Micki Krimmel at the Revver Blog for the interest and support she has showed towards our campaign with this article.
Hopefully there are other Mickis out there.
Our hearts fill with joy. We see the light.
And hear sounds.
Seriously.

Same Shape Different Color: Racism in the Mentos Community

We all remember the wonderful Mentos ads that filled our TV screens in the 90s. We all remember the freshness that those ads brought in our lives, when everything seemed so easy if you had a tube of mentos in your hands. You just needed it to put one in your mouth and the most life threatening problems would simply be washed away by the freshness of the freshmaker.
Now, there was a feeling of safety, of brotherhood in those ads. Mentos were all united to get your shiny teeth right through the screen; whether you were a frequent traveller or a sailor.
But now white mentos are discriminating pink mentos. Is there a reason for that? Is it considered “cooler” to use a white Mentos in your horrible experiments? Pink Mentos are just as good as white Mentos and they’re actually sweeter.
And what about the yellow Mentos? Why isn’t anybody saying anything about the way yellow Mentos are displayed in shops all around the world? Did you know that some shops don’t even order them?
We were talking to a friend last night about revolution. He suggested that the world is going towards the third world war and that a revolution will have to come after that. He’s kinda radical. But what can you do. We’re not sure, but we think he’s into this yellow Mentos business too. He didn’t tell us much though.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Making Mentos Free: a Brief Guide to Mints’ Revolution

The French revolution. The Cuban revolution. The Nintendo revolution. What do they all have in common? We don’t know. But have you ever tried a mentos? That sensational feeling of freshness that fills your mouth so much that you wanna kill yourself? We have.
What we are doing here is detecting the mass-hysteria of the internet-biased kids and grandpas. People’s lives are so empty that they wanna explode coke bottles by filling them with mentos and laugh their asses off. Well, there is a reason why it’s so easy to buy a gun in the United States. Actually, is there?

Day 1

This is the first official day of our campaign. During our usual morning brainstorming session we put down a list of possible names we could call this day. We all agreed that Day 1 is the most suitable.

Monday, July 24, 2006

About Us

We have backgrounds in Design, Internet engineering, Film and TV. But most of all we consider Human rights to be the goal of our professions and lives. Worried by the apocalyptic scenario of the last few weeks involving the careless sacrifice of millions of Mentos, we recently adhered to the mint rights movement by creating Save Mentos Now.
Our goal is to make a better living for mints.
And if we make a better living for mints, we make a better living for ourselves. We firmly believe that. More or less.

Sunday, July 23, 2006

Why?

Did you know that due to its high surface area, Mentos allow for a rapid release of carbon dioxide when dropped into a carbonated liquid such as Coke or Pepsi? No? well, now you do.
We think that the fact that kids and grandpas around the world laugh out loud while the poor freshmaker goes through this horrible process instead of sweetly melting into your mouth is terrible.
We believe that immediate action is necessary in order to stop this waste of freshness.
We believe that freshness is necessary to the successful development of a society.
We believe that freshness is the core of a successful relationship. Especially after you’ve chewed the onions in those juicy burgers you had last Sunday during your usual backyard barbecue.

A Brief History of the Mentos Phenomena

On May 31st 2006 Fritz Grobe and Stephen Voltz from Maine, United States, uploaded on the video-hosting website Revver the last and ultimate video of a series of experiments involving Diet Coke and Mentos. The two run around 101 bottles of coke putting mentos in them and starting a chemical reaction, involving the rapid release of carbon dioxide, that basically makes the coke explode out of the bottle creating a geyser-like effect. The video is a representation of the Las Vegas Bellagio fountain. The video earned more than five million hits in less than a month and started a wave of thousands of more experiments that fill the pages of the biggest video-hosting sites like youtube or google video.
Thousands of harmless Mentos mints have been sacrificed since then. The so-called “experimenters”, careless of the terrible pain that Mentos go through during these despicable acts, go on throwing the mints in the incredibly frightening environment of soda drinks, by ignoring their need to fulfil their mouth freshening destiny.
After the huge success of the Mentos Experiment and their followers, the Perfetti Van Melle Corporation, producers and owners of mentos have happily endorsed the production of these brutal videos, estimating that the publicity deriving from this madness has been equal to 10 millions dollars, half of their usual annual publicity and marketing budget. The Coca Cola Company, on the other side, following their renowned care of human and cultural needs has refused to ride the wave of the Mentos phenomena.
Save Mentos Now believes in the freshmaker’s freedom and right to fulfil its destiny and has been working since July 22nd 2006 in order to spread the word and stop the hectic, careless and brutal experimentation.

FAQ

Q: Have you tried the experiment yourself?
A: Yes, we have. And we did not like it. That’s why we are fighting now.
Q: Don’t you think you’re overreacting a little bit?
A: In a world where peace is a utopia, we believe that popular multi-flavoured candies like Mentos are a necessary element for the achievement of world joy. (Plus they also have the sugar-free version)
Q: Do you really, strongly believe in Mentos’ freedom and right to fulfil their purpose or is this just some smartass way to ride the wave of the popular Mentos Experiment and make a little dough?
A: We are a serious collective of people disgusted by the idea that nobody has thought of doing this until now.
Q: How many Mentos have you eaten in your life?
A: We have asked ourselves this very question many times since the creation of the Save Mentos Now collective and we believe that the number hangs firmly under ten.
Q. Then why are you wasting yours and my time with this bullshit?
A: We believe in the theory of micro-explanation of phenomena and also, sometimes summers get pretty boring.
Q: Aren’t you just jealous that you didn’t come up with the idea for the experiment first?
A: Well, the guys at eepybird made their nice amount of money and went on the David Letterman Show so, yeah, you could say we’re kinda jelous.
Q: Where are you from?
A: We believe that in order for the campaign to be steadily successful we should not disclose our location. But anyway, we live between the UK and Italy, Sherlock.
Q: Is the Perfetti Van Melle Corporation, owner of Mentos, behind this website and its campaign?
A: We wish. But if you’re some sort of manager at the company drop us a line. Actually, if you’re anybody drop us a line.
Q: What is your real job?
A: Did we ever say we have one?
Q: You should never answer a question with another question.
A: What’s the question again?
Q: Forget it.
A: Alright, I guess that’s it then.
Q: I guess. Unless…
A: What?
Q: Nothing.
A: Okay then.